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- My Mini Digital Detox – by Anna Bell
Mojomums Survey Results
1 YEAR, 1 MONTH AND 14 DAYS – that’s how long it takes a mum to get her ‘mojo’ back
It takes the average mum 1 year, 1 month and 14 days to get her pre-child self or ‘mojo’ back according to a survey*, released today which polled 1,000 mums nationwide. For some (15%) it never returns. When asked what their thoughts were before they had children, on average, mums** thought it would only take 5 months (150 days) to get their mojo back. That’s a difference of 259 days.
The poll commissioned by Mojomums (mojomums.co.uk), a new lifestyle community site which helps mums re-gain their confidence and mojo, revealed that 48% of mums believe initiating sex with their partner and not falling asleep is the biggest indicator they have their ‘mojo’ back. Other key signs include actively looking to go back to work and having an identity other than ‘mum’ (44%), maintaining appearance and buying sexy underwear (25%), finding time to paint nails and book facials (21%) and organising girly nights out (13%).
Barriers to getting your Mojo back
Overall, mums find many barriers standing in the way of getting their ‘mojo’ back. More than half (58%) say tiredness was a major factor; falling asleep in toddler beds, early morning waking and interrupted sleep in between is tough. No time to exercise and weight gain affects more than a third of mums (37%) and loss of independence and disposable income is a major barrier for 46% of mothers. Almost five in ten mums won’t get their mojo back until they have found a job they enjoy which allows a satisfactory mum/work life balance (43%).
The longer you are off work the harder it is to get your Mojo back
60% of mums believe the longer they are off work, the harder it is to get their mojo back which doesn’t bode well for 26% of mums who take two or more years away from work, and 16% of mums who remain at home for more than five years.
Myleene Klass gets the thumbs up
Celebrity mums can be a help not a hindrance for mums wanting motivation to get their ‘mojo’ back. A quarter of mums think Myleene Klass and Davina McCall are great role models as mums who have regained their mojo but Samantha Cameron and Kate Winslett provide little inspiration.
Comments psychologist, Elinor Wilde; “Although 1 year, 1 month and 14 days seems a long time, I’m not surprised by the results. Having a baby is a life changing event and you can’t expect to return to the woman you were before children over night. Mums need time to adapt, try not put themselves under pressure, and resist comparing themselves to others. They will, with time, start to feel ‘me again’ especially when they are able to enjoy activities they did pre children – there’s no better tonic than going out and having fun with friends or spending quality time with your partner.”
Continues Elinor; “mums wanting to get their Mojo back should try out at least two of the below suggestions to give themselves a boost”:
- Make an effort to exercise, even if it’s a home workout DVD. It will increase your confidence and boost energy levels.
- Talk to your partner, if you don’t feel like sex, tell him how you feel. It will help him be more understanding.
- Look at your work situation, are you happy? There are so many options for mums out there you just need to talk to people and know where to look.
- Make regular dates with your partner and friends. Don’t let the conversation revolve around children, in fact ban that topic for some of the time at least!
- Don’t feel guilty about booking some pamper time. You deserve it, your family will survive without you and everyone will feel the benefit
- Cut back your to do list, and allow yourself to get used to ‘good enough’ rather than perfect, especially when it comes to housework.
Sally Overhead, Mojomums founder and mother to 5 children all under the age of 6 comments;
“This survey reveals that mums do find it difficult to get their mojo back and it’s not as easy as you might think. We weren’t surprised to see sex is a big factor but so is work. Although mums going on maternity leave might be delighted to hang up their work clothes it appears the longer they are off, the harder it is to get their mojo back. And it’s even harder for mums who want to go back to work but can’t find a suitable job to return to.”
Says mum Janine Timoko, a lifestyle manager/counsellor, 44 with three aged between 5 and 12, living Northwest London “It took me years to get my mojo back and so much longer than I expected. I was so consumed with being a mum and looking after everyone else I didn’t have time to think about me and getting my pre-baby self back. It really affected my confidence and relationship with my partner; I had no energy and little patience. My children are older now and my job is such that I can work around school hours. It’s really boosted my confidence and I’ve finally got my mojo back”
Quiz: Have you got your Mojo back?
If you answer yes to three or more then the answer is YES.
- Do you wear ‘nice clothes’ more than you wear ‘comfy clothes’?
- Do you and your partner enjoy a good sex life?
- Do you see friends more than three times a month?
- Can you remember the last time you wore heels?
- Do you enjoy going to work?
- Have you painted your nails/had a facial or massage in the last month?
- Do you exercise more than once a week?
- Do you have a date night booked with your partner in the next 2 weeks?
Mojomums is a NEW and unique concept, providing information, guidance and support for mums who work, want to work, have their own business or are thinking of going back to work.
Mojomums offers mums a one stop solution to getting their Mojo back by giving them the confidence and support to reignite their careers successfully. It comprises of a buzzing online community offering support, advice and practical services which are all tailored to the ‘working mum’ as well as a specialist and tailored recruitment service to place mums in jobs, to suit their lifestyle needs and expertise.
“I love this idea as so often new mums needs go unnoticed in this area” Jacqueline Gold, Chief Executive Ann Summers & Knickerbox
* Survey carried out by Online Opinions 10/04/12 and 01/05/12 sample base 1000 women
**Survey carried out by Mojomums 20/04/12 and 10/05/12
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